You have a problem, you say?
[Grr. Please excuse the enormous images here. I pasted this straight from Pages, and the graphics came into Mail as PDFs. I'll touch this up later... My apologies. -Edwin]
Good day to you, too. How may I be of service to you? A problem, you say? Oh, I am sorry to hear that. May I inquire as to the nature of your problem so that I might be of assistance to you? Ah yes, I see what you’re saying. Would it be incorrect to suggest that your problem resembles the following abstract shape?
(download)
Yes? Well then, we have already taken the first step to solving your problem: We know what it is. Not only that, I believe I have something here that’ll do the trick quite nicely. You’d like to see it? Certainly!
(download)There we go. You feel better already, don’t you? It’s exquisite, is it not?
Pardon me, I didn’t catch that; could you please speak again? You don’t understand? You are right! I am so sorry: I must beg your pardon. Perhaps this will clarify things:
(download)Better? Ah, good. Excuse me? Those parts of the problem sticking out? Oh, I am sure you can take care of those some other way, if they’re really so important. I have only just met you, but you seem to be quite resourceful!
Oh yes, and those other areas… Don’t worry about those. You’ll never even notice that extra bit. Yes, they do indeed hang a bit loose around your problem there. You might try using a safety pin.
Go ahead, show it to your people. I assure you they will adore it! Yes, I would love to hear how it goes. Yes, a good day to you too!
